don't compare

One of the most damaging things you can do to yourself and your family as a wife and mother is compare yourself to others. It's hard not to do since we compare ourselves without even thinking most of the time. You have to take those thoughts and blot them out before they run amiss with you.

Comparing ourselves to other born-sinners, other imperfect moms with other weaknesses and strengths only leads us into the sin of jealousy. Jealousy is sin. Plain and simple. Our standard is not our girlfriend who we think has it all together (but really doesn't) or the older woman at church that we idolize. It's not our mother or our sister, not our neighbor, not our Bible study leader, not even the woman in line in front of us at the grocery store. No, the standard is Christ. Our focus should be fixed on Jesus as we strive for holiness knowing we will not fully attain it until we walk through the pearly gates. Other women are a poor standard...a pathetic standard. Get a real standard....Christ.

Besides, women who look like they have it all together don't. It's not possible to be the perfect wife or the perfect homemaker, or the perfect mother. In fact, it's not possible to be ALMOST the perfect woman. You don't know her weaknesses and you surely don't know the thoughts in her mind or what goes on behind clothes doors. You don't know her struggles. You most likely don't even know what her trials are or what life has dealt her in the past. You surely don't know what her future trials and struggles will be.

Some women that I've thought were perfect in the past have:

- gotten divorced
- raised wayward children
- had eating disorders
- husbands have had affairs
- suffer from diseases
- have had breast cancer
- lost their homes
- ended up in counseling
- thought about suicide
- made bad choices that had tough consequences
- had miscarriages
- had affairs themselves
- left their husbands
- left their children
- raised spoiled disobedient children
- abandoned me as a friend
- lied
- shown favoritism
- had bad attitudes
- been very selfish
- walked away from God and the church
- admitted themselves to a psych ward
- made decisions they've regretted
- had their baby die
- have acted very prideful

Comparing isn't fair to other women and it's not fair to you. Be a genuine friend who realizes we all have strengths and weaknesses. We all have trials. A mature and godly woman looks at each woman for what they are; a sinner just like herself in need of grace. It's only through the grace of God that any of us accomplish anything good for even part of our day. There is no good in any of us other than what God has graciously bestowed upon us.

Do your husband and children a favor as well and don't compare them to others either.