Making Conversation

Since I've been an adult I've noticed that there are many people whom have never learned to hold a conversation. They either sit in silence making you do all the work of carrying the conversation, answering only "yes" or "no" to your questions or they talk about themselves the entire time never asking you anything about yourself.

The art of conversation is a learned skill I believe and one worth investing time in learning! Here are a few questions fit for conversation making in certain settings and circumstances. These might be helpful but I hope that overall, I teach you by example how to properly make conversation so that you are not "social inept".

Questions to Get to Know People Better

1. Where did you grow up?
2. Where did you go to school and what did you study?
3. How did you meet your spouse and how long have you been married?
4. What dreams do you have for the future?
5. What is one thing you have never done that you wish you could do?
6. What is the most important thing you have accomplished in your life?
7. What do you enjoy doing with your spare time?
8. If you could do anything other than what you are doing now, what would you do?
9. Ask questions about their work, their kids, where they like to vacation or their favorite foods.
10. What books are they currently reading?

Questions for Biblical Fellowship

1. What is one thing you could do this year to increase your enjoyment of God?
2. In which spiritual discipline do you most want to make progress this year and what are you doing to this end?
3. Who is one person you would like to spend time with asking questions about their relationship with the Lord?
4. What is one new way you could help strengthen the church?
5. What is one thing you could do to improve your prayer life?
6. What habit would you most like to establish this year?
7. Who do you most want to encourage this year?
8. What book, in addition to the Bible, do you most want to read this year?
9. In what area of your life do you most need growth and what will you do about it?
10. What one biblical doctrine do you most want to understand better this year?

Questions to Get to Know Internationals Better

1. What country are you from?
2. Can you describe your daily life and family traditions in your home country?
3. What was your education like and what are your interests?
4. What are your impressions of our country?
5. Were you brought up in a religious home?
6. What foods are unique to your country?/ what food from our country do you enjoy?
7. Would you teach me a few words in your native language?
8. Are there any questions you would like to ask me?
9. What are your special holidays and how do you celebrate them?
10. Is there any way I can serve you?

Why is etiquette important?

Etiquette is the practice of putting others first before yourself. It's the act of denying self and giving others preference. Etiquette says "I care more about not offending you than I care about going about my own way." Etiquette acted out is manners. Manners are every day ways to act selflessly. Etiquette is the discipline by which we keep selfishness in check. It's a small way to sacrifice for others.

Christ was the best example of etiquette and manners.

say "thank you"

When I was a child my mother taught me to say "thank you" 3 times for every gift I received from someone. Most children painfully had to offer up one "thank you" for a gift outside their family but my siblings and I had to find THREE opportunities to say it. You can be sure that my mother watched us and counted waiting to hear our 3 "thank you's". Mom said that this insured that the giver heard us say "thank you" and insured that they knew we were grateful. Not that I was to say "thank you, thank you, thank you" all in one sentence....but rather something like this:

1. "thank you" when given the gift or opening the gift
2. "thank you again for the gift" when we part from our visiting to say goodbye
3. send a thank you card in the mail

That was three times. Depending on the gift it was more appropriate to say "thank you" 3 times before parting instead of sending the "thank you" card. But thank you cards were always encouraged as well. I was always taught to send a "thank you" card and in a timely manner. I've not always been good about sending them in a timely manner but it's never too late to say "thank you".

It's especially important to send thank you cards for bridal shower gifts and wedding gifts. These are expensive gifts that guest often have taken quite a bit of time to pick out for you. Showing gratitude is the least you can do. It's very little trouble you have to go to to send a card considering the blessing you have received by the gifts.

In a world that is selfish and usually ungrateful, you can be a testimony of Christ by your thankfulness. Scripture tells us to have a thankful heart more than once in it's pages. Thankfulness will go against the general flow of society that thinks it deserves everything. Don't be the lazy bride or the selfish child. Be thankful and be sure the givers around you know you are thankful.